


Five Times Alex Looked at Maggie

by brinshannara



Series: Time and Again [1]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-10
Updated: 2016-12-10
Packaged: 2018-09-07 15:09:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8805667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brinshannara/pseuds/brinshannara
Summary: Five short fics that give a deeper examination of Alex's perspective during five major interactions between Alex and Maggie. (2x03 - Welcome to Earth, 2x04 - Survivors, 2x05 - Crossfire)





	1. The First Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first time Alex Danvers meets Maggie Sawyer, from 2x03 (Welcome to Earth).

#### The First Time

"Winn's working on tracking him," Alex assured Kara. "In the meantime, let's gather whatever evidence we can find," she said, waving her hand to encompass the nearby area. She glanced around at the crime scene, scanning over it and stopped as her eyes landed on a crouching woman, who was clearly examining another part of the crime scene maybe 30 feet away.

 _'Who in the hell is that?'_ Alex thought to herself, angrily.

With purpose, she strode away from Kara and Carl, who was collecting evidence near where she and Kara had been speaking, and towards the unfamiliar figure.

"Hey, what the hell do you think you're doing to my crime scene?" she demanded as she walked up to her.

The woman, a strikingly lovely Latina, with dark, flowing hair, straightened, a smile of sorts on her face.

"Anyone ever tell you all you Feds are the same?" she replied, snarkily, putting her hands on her hips. "It's like you all watch the same bad movies together at Quantico."

Alex had no patience for this interloper. "Who are you?" she asked, directly.

The mysterious woman held her gaze for a beat before relenting and answering her. "Detective Maggie Sawyer, NCPD, Science Division," she said, reaching for her badge. "We handle all cases involving aliens and things that go bump in the night." She held her identification out for a brief inspection. "Showed you mine. Show me yours."

 _'Attitude,'_ Alex thought. She reached behind her back for her own badge and thumbed the switch that would display a Secret Service badge, rather than the regular DEO one. "Alex Danvers, Secret Service," she said, flashing the identification at the other woman, easily slipping into the familiar, authoritative persona. "I'm sure you mean well, Detective, but this is a federal crime scene," she said, just a little condescendingly. "You're contaminating my evidence," she added, just to drive home the point that the detective wasn't welcome.

The Latina wasn't having any of it. "I'm contaminating it? Your lackey, over there," she said, indicating Carl, "is bagging charred carpet and crispy limo into the same ziplock." She paused. "I thought the Secret Service would pay closer attention to detail." She seemed pleased with her jab.

That was it. Alex was not going to let some municipal police officer, who probably had no idea what an actual alien looked like, tell her what was what, much less critique her team's work. She took a couple of steps forward, stopping just at the edge of the detective's personal space, knowing that her height as compared to the detective's, would naturally work to intimidate the other woman. "We have technology that makes your city PD lab look like an Easy-Bake oven," she threw back.

The smaller woman wasn't backing off. She took a couple of steps forward, herself. "And us dumb local cops would never deduce that the President's assailant was either Kryptonian or Infernian." She paused, smirking, keeping Alex's gaze. "Both species have heat vision."

Alex was surprised that the stranger knew that much. Clearly, the other woman was showing off. _'Enough,_ ' she thought, forcing herself to remain calm in front of the stranger. "Thank you," she said, snidely, "we'll take it from here."

But the detective was not so easily dismissed. "The airport's within my jurisdiction," she said, calmly informing Alex of the fact. As if Alex didn't know.

"Your jurisdiction," Alex retorted, "ends," she paused for emphasis, "where I say it does." She crossed her arms, trying not to show her infuriation with this woman. She had to project her authority, not her annoyance. 

At that, Detective Sawyer smirked, looked down at the evidence she'd been examining, then smiled and looked back up at Alex. "See ya 'round, Danvers," she said, as she turned and walked away.

Alex kept watching, making sure the troublesome detective actually left the area. Satisfied she was leaving, Alex turned back around and walked towards Carl.

"Make sure you're bagging that up properly," she snapped as she walked past him, obviously agitated.

She was unnerved and rattled. Not only had the cop questioned her team, questioned their competence and, most boldly of all, challenged Alex directly, but she seemed to know what she was talking about. Alex hadn't expected that. She turned back to see Detective Sawyer get into her police car and drive away, the other woman's final words to her still echoing in her ears.


	2. At the DEO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The interaction from the end of 2x03 (Welcome to Earth), after Maggie's been patched up.

#### At the DEO

Alex walked into the medical lab, where the patient was sitting up on the bed, inspecting the bandage on her left shoulder.

Detective Maggie Sawyer looked up as Alex approached. "This place is sick!" she exclaimed. "Like James-Bond-Bad-Guy-Hideout sick!"

Alex smiled, folding her arms across her chest. "Yeah, we have our moments," she admitted. Her eyes were drawn to Sawyer's shoulder wound. "Minor first degree burn and a bruised collarbone," she said, lapsing into the medicine of it. "You should be fine in a few days," she informed the detective.

Sawyer just smiled back. "Gee, I didn't think you cared," she deadpanned.

"Yeah," scoffed Alex, believing that the other woman was calling her out on her behaviour in their initial encounter. Despite going to that bar together, despite saving her from Scorch with Kara, Alex now saw that the police officer clearly still felt as though they were adversaries. And she didn't like it. More to the point, she didn't know how to react to that possibility.

"I'm just kidding," Sawyer said, quickly. "I owe you big," she said. "You saved my life."

Alex felt a profound sense of relief. _'It was a joke. People tell jokes, Alex,'_ she thought to herself. "Happy to," she said, aloud. She took a breath. "You did something for me, too, you know," she admitted. "I, um," she shook her head and tore her gaze from the detective, looking around the lab, trying to find the words. "I've been hunting aliens for so long," she said, returning her gaze to Sawyer, for a moment. "That I never really stopped to consider that maybe they weren't all hostiles to be caged," she said, unfolding her arms.

Sawyer nodded, smiling and Alex stood there smiling back.

"You know," the detective said, after a moment, "I don't really do well with partners, but... I think we made a pretty good team," she admitted.

Alex smiled, feeling a jolt of warmth in her chest. "Yeah," she said, "I guess we did."

Sawyer then hopped off the bed and reached for her jacket.

"You should really get some rest," Alex instructed the detective. "You can stay here, if you want," she offered, in what she hoped was a casual, off-hand way. She wanted to talk more with Sawyer, get to know her better. _'Maybe then I can actually get it when she tells a joke,'_ she thought to herself.

"No," Sawyer said, grimacing as she pulled her jacket on over her injured shoulder, "I can't."

Alex looked at her skeptically. "What, you got a hot date or something?" she asked, more in jest than anything else.

"Actually," Sawyer said, "I do, and I don't want to leave the lady waiting," she smiled.

 _'Oh,'_ Alex thought to herself, feeling at once absurd and disappointed, as Sawyer pulled her jacket into place.

"See ya 'round, Danvers," the detective said, repeating her words from their first meeting. She smiled again and turned, heading out the door.

Alex nodded and smiled back and folded her arms across her chest, watching Sawyer leave. There was something about the cop, something that left Alex rattled. Alex did not rattle easily. Even when in a plane that was about to crash, with no expectations whatsoever that Kara would save her, Alex was calm and collected and ready to accept whatever happened. But this woman... She got flustered, that's what kept happening. She kept getting flustered. Every single time they chatted, Alex felt like she was out of place, out of sorts and completely, utterly flustered, although she hoped she'd managed to keep it together externally. For God's sake, she didn't even get it when Sawyer had made a damn joke. Alex winced inwardly. How awkward had that particular exchange been?

Her thoughts drifted back to their first meeting. She had immediately felt defensive of the crime scene and her team's work, instead of authoratative and in charge, like she normally did.

Then, the weird call to come to the dive bar, which ended up being an alien bar... that whole encounter had been weird. Finding out there were aliens who regularly hung out there? Weird. Finding out that Sawyer had dated that female bartender? That ALIEN female bartender? Totally weird. Then Sawyer casually saying that she wasn't straight, although Alex had sort of already deduced that... All of it had made Alex feel weird. In reality, the only time Alex had felt somewhat normal around Sawyer was when she and Kara had rescued her. And, even then, the detective had managed to surprise her by knocking Scorch out with a piece of pipe.

Even here, in the DEO, in this very lab, Sawyer had been able to make Alex feel off-kilter. And that had been before she'd informed Alex that yes, she did, in fact, have a hot date, leading to her completely disregarding the sound medical advice of more rest.

Despite the woman causing her to feel flustered and off-kilter, Alex was realizing that she was beginning to enjoy the detective's company. _'See ya 'round, Danvers?'_ she thought to herself, remembering Sawyer's farewell. _'I certainly hope so.'_


	3. Outside the Warehouse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How Alex felt during the phone call with Maggie and their meeting Roulette's warehouse from 2x04 (Survivors).

#### Outside the Warehouse

Her phone rang. Alex smiled as she saw the caller ID pop up on the screen.

"Sawyer," she said, answering the phone.

"Danvers," came the voice on the other end. "Got a tip. You in?" she asked.

"That was fast," Alex said, intrigued.

"Texting you the location," Sawyer said. "Oh, oh, and I almost forgot: wear something nice." With that, the detective disconnected the call.

"Wear something nice?" Alex said aloud to herself. "What the hell does that mean, _'wear something nice'_?"

She got the location from Sawyer and debated for a moment. She thumbed through her phone's contacts and considered writing to Kara to ask what "something nice" actually meant, but decided that would be too conspicuous. Kara would have all kinds of questions, questions to which Alex didn't even have answers at this point.

She sighed to herself and texted Sawyer back. "So when you say wear something nice..." she wrote.

"I meant what I said: wear something nice."

Alex rolled her eyes so far back into her head it almost hurt. Why did the detective always have to be so infuriating? "Okay, so what are you wearing?" she challenged the other woman.

"My, my, Danvers, are you always so forward? ;)" came the reply.

Alex turned beet red and was in the middle of writing her back, apologizing, when Sawyer's next text came in.

"I will be wearing a dress. You do have a nice dress, don't you, Danvers?"

Thankful for the second text with the actual information she was seeking, Alex erased her half-finished apology. _'It was a joke, Alex,'_ she told herself. _'You've got to learn how to tell when she's joking.'_ She texted back that yes, she had a dress.

"And it's a nice dress?" came the reply.

"Yes, it's a nice dress!" she answered, second-guessing the use of an exclamation mark after she'd hit send. Of course.

"Good. See you in an hour, Danvers. Don't be late. I don't like to be kept waiting."

Alex jumped up, shoved her phone in her pocket and headed home, so very grateful that they'd moved most of the DEO day-to-day operations to the location near her apartment.

* * *

64 minutes later, Alex was walking down a long, dark alley by a large warehouse, in one of the less-reputable parts of National City. She hated being without a weapon. As if the dress she was wearing didn't make her feel awkward enough, she felt absolutely naked without a weapon at her side. As such, she was caught up in taking in everything around her and trying to analyze the situation as she walked down the alley. It wasn't until the woman at the far end of the alley turned around, as Alex approached, that she realized the woman was actually Sawyer. In a dress. And not just any dress. It was a *dress*. And heels. And there was makeup. And earrings. And her hair was done up. _'Wow,'_ she breathed to herself.

"You clean up nice," Sawyer declared, looking her over.

Alex found herself blushing as she approached. "I do?" she asked, accompanied by a self-deprecating laugh. "Well, you do too," she offered, clumsily, "with the shoes and the hair and all the..." She ineffectually waved her hand to help give meaning to her words.

"I'm not all business," Sawyer smiled.

"But this is... right?" Alex asked, suddenly wondering what Sawyer had gotten her dressed up for, particularly in this area of town. Oddly, she found that she trusted the detective already, and she was a little nervous at the prospect that perhaps her trust had been misplaced. "I mean... what are we doing here?" she asked, looking behind her up at the warehouse, trying to discern its purpose.

"Wait for it," Sawyer assured her. "Here," she said, handing her a mask, then donning her own.

Alex put hers on as well and then looked over at Sawyer with as much skepticism as she could muster from behind the mask, as if to say _'now what'_ , when the detective looked down and very decisively laced the fingers of her right hand with Alex's left hand. Alex blinked and then Sawyer was confidently walking towards what was clearly the entrance for the warehouse. Alex stumbled in her heels as she hurried to catch up to the detective, staring at their joined hands as though she had never held someone's hand before.

She had, of course. Held hands with others. With boys whom she had dated. With her female friends, though only some of them and probably not since talking all night long about deep, philosophical questions while hanging out in her college dorm. With Kara, with whom few physical boundaries existed. Somehow, this seemed different from any of those situations. It wasn't as forced as it usually had been with various boys. It wasn't as routine and unremarkable as with most of her female friends or Kara. Maybe it was the fact that Sawyer still hadn't told her what they were doing here. Maybe it was walking into a place with zero idea as to what awaited them. Maybe it was something else entirely. Whatever the case, Alex's senses felt heightened and she took comfort in the warmth of Sawyer's strong hand in hers.

As they rounded the corner, Alex could see it was a formal gathering, hence the necessity for a nice dress. Sawyer led them through the crowd near the entrance with purpose, acting as though she belonged. Alex was surprised that no one stopped them for identification or asked to see an invitation, but then, she realized, that was probably why the masks were in place. This was an event where anonymity was encouraged and so, logically, only people who should know about the event should be attending, eliminating the need for much more than minimal security.

They walked into the venue together, unchallenged, hands still clasped, and Alex realized then that the hand-holding had probably been a tactical decision by Sawyer to strengthen their cover. It might have been an anonymous gathering, but two women walking in without escorts might have raised an eyebrow. At least more of an eyebrow than two women coming to the warehouse who were clearly together, given that the bouncer had barely given them a look.

As they walked further into the warehouse, they murmured to each other about the various guests in attendance and then it was with very real regret that Alex felt Sawyer's hand pull away. She felt the loss of contact keenly. Even after Sawyer handed her one of the two flutes of champagne she had snagged from a passing server, Alex kept her left hand free, in case Sawyer should want to slip her hand back into Alex's. But she didn't and then the evening's events began.

It wasn't until after she'd made sure Kara was okay, when she was finally home, slowly drifting off to sleep in her own bed, that she again thought about the events prior to discovering the fight club. Though she wouldn't remember it in the morning, Alex fell asleep smiling, remembering the soft warmth, strength and comfort she'd felt for those few precious moments while Sawyer had held her hand.


	4. Dumped

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex's reaction to Maggie telling her she'd been dumped by her girlfriend, from 2x05 (Crossfire).

#### Dumped

Alex leaned over the table, settled the tip of cue in the groove between her left thumb and forefinger and took careful aim. With unerring precision, she drew the cue back and then pushed it forward again, with just enough force to hit the cue ball into the eight, sending it towards the far left corner of the table, dropping into the pocket with a satisfying thunk. _'Victory,'_ she smiled to herself. To the detective's credit, it had been a close game, with the other woman having just the 11 ball left to go before the eight.

"Whoah!" Sawyer said. "I don't get the chance to win back my money?"

"Uh, with the rate that you play," Alex said, "we'd be here for hours." She rubbed the bills that represented her winnings together between her fingers. "Your girlfriend would have to put out an APB," she teased, gently.

"Not likely," Sawyer replied, "we broke up." She walked away.

Alex was stunned. "Oh my God, I'm sorry!" she said, running up to the detective. "What... what happened?"

"She dumped me," the other woman answered.

Alex let that sink in. "SHE dumped _YOU_?" she asked, scoffing. "Who would _DO_ that?!" she demanded incredulously, as she followed Sawyer up to the bar.

"She did. Convincingly," came the response. Sawyer put her half-empty beer glass on the bar.

Still unable to believe anyone would break up with Maggie Sawyer, Alex considered the possibilities. "Well, maybe it was just a fight," she offered.

"Well," Maggie said, "she said I was hard-headed, insensitive, obsessed with work..."

Alex nodded along. "That's not so bad," she said, identifying with all of those characteristics herself. She didn't date often, to be sure, but when she did, the biggest complaint was usually that she was obsessed with work. _'None of those should really be dealbreakers,'_ Alex thought to herself.

"Also borderline sociopathic..."

_'Ah, there it is,'_ Alex thought, better understanding the situation, though she was still floored at the fact that Maggie was the one who had been dumped.

"And, uh, she never wants to see me again, so I'm pretty sure it's over."

She struggled to find words of comfort for the detective. "Well, her loss," she finally said, with the utmost sincerity. Alex smiled and lifted her glass towards the other woman in a toasting motion.

Maggie didn't even react to Alex's words. "I just thought, you know, she was..." she trailed off, scoffing.

Throughout the entire conversation, Maggie had been a bit skittish, avoiding much direct eye contact, looking elsewhere, even seeming nervous. Throughout all of their various interactions, they hadn't ever really spent much time at all talking about their personal lives. Maybe she wasn't fully comfortable when it came to opening up about personal stuff. Alex could certainly understand. She wasn't much of an open book, either. She gazed at the detective whose hair was falling in front of her face, obscuring it so Alex couldn't see her eyes. She found herself leaning forward, almost comically, trying to peer around the Latina's hair. "Thought she was what?" she prompted, gently.

Finally, Maggie turned to look at Alex directly and the mostly cocky, confident cop was back in place of the woman who had been on the verge of opening up. "Look, I appreciate the beer and the pool, but I think I need to go home, and drink something a little harder and lose my cool." She paused, as though she was going to say something else and Alex briefly wondered if she was going to ask her to join her. "See you later," Maggie said, abruptly, then turned and walked away.

"Okay, well, I..." Alex said, tripping over the words. "Feel better," she called out, somewhat lamely, as she watched Maggie move quickly towards the bar's exit.

She sat down on a stool and sipped at her own drink, pensively. It had been a long time since Alex had made a good friend, but she felt that she and Maggie were on the way. They'd been having fun! Three games of pool and a couple of beers and then... Alex sighed and took another drink of her beer. She found that she already missed the detective's presence. She hadn't been ready for the evening to end and to end so abruptly, on such a sour note. Alex felt badly that Maggie had preferred to bail rather than talk to her about it. _'I wish I could help her,'_ she thought to herself. 

Alex had finished her beer and was walking home when she decided to text Maggie. "I'm here if you ever want to talk about it." She hit send and carried her phone in her hand the rest of the way home, waiting for a reply that never came.


	5. I Didn't Know You Were Into Girls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maggie thinks Alex is into girls. Alex kind of freaks out. From 2x05 (Crossfire), plus a lot of processing after that conversation.

#### I Didn't Know You Were Into Girls

 _'There she is,'_ Alex thought to herself, smiling. While it wasn't a huge leap to guess that Maggie would be working the scene at the Diamond Exchange, she was still pleased to see the other woman.

Maggie caught sight of her and walked over to her, handing over a bag of evidence to another officer. "You know," she said, with her characteristic bluntness, "they didn't teach me one thing about anti-gravity guns at the academy."

"We're analyzing thermal residue to look for any electromagnetic component to these weapons so we can create a countermeasure," Alex replied, hoping that would be helpful to know.

Maggie scoffed. "Nerd," came the accusation, softened by the amazing smile on Maggie's face, as she walked past Alex to sign off on the crime scene investigation.

Normally, it stung, being called a nerd. Alex had dealt with it her entire life because that's what tended to happen to people who liked science, who liked to learn, who enjoyed reading for class and for pleasure. So Alex had been called a nerd countless times in her life, but this time? With that smile attached to it? It didn't hurt at all.

Alex smiled and turned around, catching up to Maggie.

"How are you feeling?" she asked, tentatively. In truth, it's all she really wanted to know. Her texts had gone unanswered since they'd seen each other at the bar the night before and she found herself worried and concerned for her new friend. "Any better?"

"Now I just feel like I got kicked in the gut instead of the face," Maggie said, scribbling her signature on the paperwork. 

Alex made a face. _'Not quite the improvement I was hoping for,'_ she thought to herself. "Well," she said, following Maggie again, who was heading towards the yellow tape, marking the edge of the crime scene. "After you file your report, do you wanna... you wanna go do something?" she asked. "There's a great pinball bar that I know, or um, that, that food channel guy's new tapas place opened?"

"I don't really feel like I'm up to it," Maggie replied, after ducking under the yellow tape.

"Come on!" Alex said, chasing after her. "You, you should come out!" she insisted. "We'll... we'll go.. and, ah, you know, have fun and celebrate... singledom!" She knew it was lame, but she also knew that all she really wanted to do was to make Maggie feel better and she felt that hanging out would do that. Dammit, she wasn't all that good at this friendship stuff. Why did Maggie have to make it harder than it already was?

"I don't really feel like celebrating being dumped," Maggie replied, stubbornly. She dropped her clipboard into the open window of her cruiser, letting it fall on to the passenger seat.

 _'Crap,'_ Alex cringed. "Maggie, that's, that's not what I meant," she said, apologetically.

The other woman turned her head to face her. "What DO you mean?" she asked, pulling off her windbreaker with the word POLICE on it and similarly dropping it into the car. 

"I just thought that we could go and have some fun," she explained, "keep each other company."

Maggie leaned against the police cruiser, gazing at Alex, pensively. "You and me?" she asked, sounding a little surprised.

"Yes! Why? Why? What's, what's wrong with that?" Alex responded, somewhat flustered, wondering why on earth the two of them hanging out would be something that would surprise Maggie.

Maggie pinned her with an odd look and a strange smile. "Nothing, I just..." she said, shaking her head, "I think I read you wrong," Maggie replied. 

Alex blinked. "What do you mean?" she asked, completely confused.

"I... I didn't know you were into girls," Maggie said, simply.

Those few, simple words broke Alex Danvers and started her mind going down a variety of paths that she'd trained herself to avoid over the years. The words that tumbled out of her mouth in the next moment were the very first ones that came to mind. "I'm not!" she exclaimed.

Maggie fumbled for her words. "Oh, my bad, then, sorry..." she muttered.

"No, no, no, I mean, no offense, Maggie, I--"

"No, I get it," Maggie said, firmly, "you're not gay."

"Right!" Alex answered.

The detective looked at her, curiously. "You'd be surprised how many gay women I've heard that from," she said.

Alex didn't even have words for that. Her brain was still processing all the possibilities, tiptoeing down dark corridors filled with forgotten memories.

"Sorry, I, I, I just... I thought you were angling or something or--"

"No, I wasn't, I was just trying to..." she trailed off. _'I have to get out of here,'_ she thought, frantically. She took a breath, trying to calm down, to get some words out. "I'll... I'll... I'll let you know when we make some progress," she finally managed to say, then gave a quick smile and quickly walked away, not even waiting for Maggie to say anything else.

She wasn't into girls. She _couldn't_ be into girls. And who the hell was Maggie Sawyer anyway, telling her that lots of gay women had said they weren't into girls? How dare she? Just because Maggie liked girls didn't mean everyone else had to!

As Alex kept walking, she kept getting angrier. She scoffed to herself. Sure, she didn't date much, but she had work! Not that many people out there understood what it meant to work for something like the DEO. It didn't leave a ton of time for dating. Obviously, Maggie didn't get that.

It seemed to leave some time for hanging out with Kara, of course, but Kara was a huge priority in her life. She always had been and always would be. That was non-negotiable.

And, she reflected, it did leave some time for hanging out with Maggie, lately, to play pool or have a drink.

But dating? No time. No time to get all dressed up and go out and meet some random guy who was, hopefully, not a complete jackass. No time to get to know the guy, in order to determine if he was a jackass. Frankly, she had no desire to jump through all the hoops it would require for her to end up actually dating a guy, especially if he was just going to then complain that she was obsessed with work.

She got to her apartment building and opened the front door before walking up the three flights of steps to her apartment. She opened the door and stepped inside, draping her jacket on the nearby chair. She headed for her liquor.

"Seriously, she thinks she knows me?" she scoffed, as she poured herself a double whiskey. She took the glass and brought it to her couch, where she sat back and put her feet up while sipping the alcohol, pensively.

"I am not into girls," she said aloud, firmly. "The lack of a love life with men doesn't mean that I'm into girls."

She sipped at her drink.

There was a voice in her head, one that had been buzzing at her since Maggie had made her assumption. Now that her anger had ebbed a little, it was being persistent, questioning her at every opportunity.

 _*This time that you say you don't have to invest in someone... haven't you been doing that with Maggie?*_ it asked.

 _'That's different,'_ she thought.

_*Is it?*_

She frowned at the thought and took another mouthful, letting the drink burn its way down her throat. 

_*Why do you want to spend all your free time with Maggie?*_

_'She's a new friend. There's nothing wrong with making friends,'_ she thought.

_*Why does thinking of Maggie make you smile?*_

_'Shut up.'_ She took another drink.

_*Why were you jealous of her hot date?*_

_'I wasn't. I just wanted to make sure she got enough rest after being injured.'_

_*Why did your heart sink when she kissed her girlfriend in front of you?*_

_'Because I don't have a relationship and I was jealous that she did.'_

_*Why did your heart skip a beat when she told you she and her girlfriend had broken up?*_

_'It was a surprise.'_

_*Why have you been pushing Maggie to spend time with you?*_

_'To help her get over the breakup.'_

_*Why don't you enjoy sex?*_ the voice asked.

 _'I'm not wired that way,'_ she answered it, angrily.

_*Yet you enjoy it just fine when you're alone.*_

_'I'm a control freak and I don't like being vulnerable around others. So sue me.'_

Alex Danvers sat there for the rest of the evening, fighting an internal war with herself. For almost every accusation, she had an answer, a reason, an explanation.

_*What about Vicki Donahue?*_

And that's where Alex ran out of answers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a loosely-related follow up to this called [What We're Meant to Be](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8805823) and yes, there will be another Five Times series of short ficlets from Alex's perspective. Stay tuned!


End file.
